Having A C-Section Birth Makes You Less Of A Mother – Really?

pregnantmomI’ve been hearing disturbing comments lately that having a C-Section makes you less of a mother.

I’ve also heard equally disturbing comments that having a C-Section isn’t giving birth.  If a woman having a C-Section didn’t give birth, where did the baby come from?  Did the doctor give birth to my baby?  I don’t think so.

What basis do these comments and accusations have?  None of these things could be further from the truth.  It’s as if people who say these things are harboring some sort of animosity or resentment towards moms who have a C-Section birth.

Why is that?

I suspect the resentment comes from vaginal birth moms feeling like C-Section moms escaped the pain of a vaginal birth accusing them of taking the easy, less painful route. However only a woman who has not had a C-Section could in all good conscience say that a C-Section mom took the easy route.  There’s nothing ‘easy’ about having a C-Section.  Am I right C-Section moms?

There is no avoiding pain in childbirth.  It’s either pain now or pain later.  It’s a painful process no matter how you look at it.

Having a C-Section birth is really about health and safety. A mother who has a C-Section makes a huge sacrifice ensuring the safety of her baby; and herself. and she is most often advised that her baby’s health is at risk if she continues birthing vaginally.

To ignore legitimate health risks and continue with a vaginal birth could be very risky for both mom and baby.  Here are a few reasons why a C-Section may be required and the risk it poses if not done.

  • Fetal distress: brain damage or death to her baby
  • Obstetric fistula: a hole, between mother’s rectal and vaginal passages causing nerve damage that blocks brain signals when she needs to urinate or empty her bowels.
  • Placental Problems:  Avoiding a C-Section could lead to severe bleeding during vaginal birth.
  • Exposing infectious diseases:  A vaginal birth if a mom has an infection such as HIV or genital herpes exposes baby to the same diseases.
  • Chronic health condition for mom: A Vaginal birth for a mom that has high blood pressure or diabetes could be fatal for mom.

Here’s the story of one courageous mom who if she didn’t have a C-Section when she did, she and/or her baby may not have lived.

http://www.lifewithbabykicks.com/2015/04/the-dramatic-birth-of-baby-boy.html

A mom advised to have a C-Section must think of her unborn baby as well as herself, but often times a mom has other children at home, she has to think of them as well when it comes to her own health.

But what about the comments that a C-Section birth makes you less of a mother?

Not true! Being a mom is about making sacrifices. There’s not a mom in the world that doesn’t sacrifice something for her child.  It doesn’t matter if you gave birth vaginally or by C-Section.

Contrary to popular belief not all women have physical capabilities that make for a healthy childbirth.  The ability we have to perform C-Sections increases the chance for both mom and baby to both live and/or avoid serious medical hazards.

In the poem ‘What is a Mother‘, no where does it describe a mother as someone who gives birth vaginally.

A good mother takes care of her body and her unborn child, she is nurturing, supportive, patient, sacrificing, and caring. Neither having a C-Section or a vaginal birth influences any of those things.

Every c section mother I know had a C-Section for the sake of her baby and/or her own health. Circumstances may have been breech, a medical condition for mom or there was no safe way for the baby to be born vaginally.

To say that you’re less of a mother because of having a C-Section is pure nonsense and is a display of ignorance.

To me anyone who puts their baby’s safety first is not only a superior mother, they are heroes.

What are your thoughts?

Blessings,
Elizabeth

Photo by imagerymajestic & Freedigitalphotos.net

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One thought on “Having A C-Section Birth Makes You Less Of A Mother – Really?

  1. Danielle says:

    Thank you for posting this and being encouraging and up-lifting. I am currently pregnant with my 4th child and will be having a 4th c-section. My first was emergency, I was in the hospital at midnight after having contractions all day and being at 4cm dilated. I was given pitocin and had my water broken. 10 hours later I was only 7cm dilated and the doctor discovered that my baby’s head was slightly tilted and it seemed like he was trying to come out shoulder first and was stuck along with my cervix not dilating. He pushed me to have a c-section so, out of concern for my child and myself, I agreed. I was given oxygen (I was already on a spinal tap) and my body went into complete shock. I felt the doctor cutting into me and I screamed in pain, though the nurses insisted it was just pressure (it was a very sharp pain). When they pulled him out, I saw him for barely a minute and passed out from exhaustion and pain. That was the most terrifying and horrible experience of my life.

    With my 2nd, I was way too scared to even think about VBAC. I did not want a repeat of what happened with my 1st child… so we scheduled a c-section and it went perfectly.

    With my 3rd I braved up because I felt a motherly desire to experience birth vaginally. I had a strong desire to hold my baby when he came out, have skin-to-skin, breastfeed, and just love on him immediately instead of waiting. My doctor said he would faithfully do whatever I chose but he explained the risks of VBAC after having 2 c-sections and no successful vaginal births. He put it like this: “If your child had a 4% chance of dying or having cerebral palsy by going to school today, would you send him?” I cried, and cried, and cried. I knew that the safety of my child (and myself!) was far more important than my desire to experience birth naturally. I was heart broken, and still am, that I would never be able to hold my baby and love him/her right after he/she was born. I would always have to wait hours for the nurses to clean him up and check all his vitals and so on.

    I have a friend who is now pushing me to try VBAC, she keeps talking about how she read this story about a woman who had a successful VBAC after 3 c-sections, and how natural birth is much better for baby, and so on. But she insists she is “not judging” and that she is just “making suggestions”. It took me months to get over not having a VBAC with my 3rd, and now all those feelings are flooding right back. I cried for 3 nights after she argued with me about this. She is not understanding that I am more concerned with my baby’s safety than with experiencing birth the natural way. I am still hurting over her bringing this up and pushing her opinions on me (2 weeks ago).

    Your post brings me comfort. All of my babies are alive, healthy, smart, and beautiful and I wouldn’t change a thing. At the end of the day, the safety of my babies is what matters most and I am proud to be a c-section mom.

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